This week, three stories broke me open.
A headmaster was caught on video touching a student inappropriately — in the same community where I grew up. Another man, also a headmaster, was filmed raping a child. And then on TikTok, a Ghanaian man bragged about sleeping with a woman who woke up not knowing how she got to his hotel room.
Different men, different settings — but the same sickness.
A culture that excuses men and blames women.
A culture that calls rape “a misunderstanding” or worse, “a spiritual problem.”
When the Law Protects Predators
When the news broke about the headmaster touching his student, an elected MP went on television to defend him. His argument? The girl was sixteen — and because that’s the legal age of consent in Ghana, the headmaster had done nothing wrong.
There was public outrage, and eventually, he apologised. But I wasn’t surprised.
Growing up in Ghana as a young girl means most of the male attention you get as a teenager will come from older men. I remember my own experiences — the way grown men talked to me, the way their eyes lingered.
It’s shocking that this nonsense continues to be normalised.
When We Call Abuse ‘Attention’
We joke about “sugar daddies” and call young girls who are abused by older men “spoiled” or “wayward.”
We turn predators into uncles, teachers, and pastors — and still say, “oh, that’s just how men are.”
But must it always be that way?
Less than a month ago, a 13-year-old Ghanaian girl posted a video of herself and a friend going on a walk. The comments under her post were appalling — grown men talking about her body, about how she was “developing nicely,” even counting down to when she would turn sixteen, the legal age of consent.
When the girl decided to speak out and say she didn’t find those comments acceptable, a self-proclaimed Christian marriage counsellor — a man — went on several radio stations to condemn her for daring to address men.
Instead of condemning the paedophilic comments, he changed the conversation to whether the girl should even be online.
Why must young girls be silent so men can exercise their perversion without consequence?
When Logic Leaves the Conversation
When that counsellor stepped in, I knew all logic had left the conversation.
Instead of teaching men accountability, we teach girls to pray for protection.
We hide violence behind culture and call it “respect.”
We hide guilt behind spirits and call it “faith.”
A few friends and I couldn’t contain our anger any longer. We took to TikTok Live to talk about it — and almost every woman who joined had either been sexually harassed by an older man or knew someone who had.
As we went deeper, one painful truth emerged:
Many women never speak because they fear being labelled “bad girls.”
When did we normalise shaming our children into silence to protect grown men?
When Innocence Is Stolen
Do you know how many women — in Ghana and across Africa — lost their innocence not to love, but to force?
One of my closest friends from school was raped by an older boy we both knew. I was the first person she told. In my naivety, I asked her why she didn’t scream — as if the world we lived in would have believed her.
In a society where rape victims are still asked what they were wearing, or why they went to a man’s house, what chance did she really have?
So many of us learned to carry shame that was never ours to carry.
Koya Nkrumah
We have become silent graves for men’s sins.
When Silence Feeds the Sickness
Listen to any women-centred radio show in Ghana and you’ll hear endless stories of abuse — fathers defiling their own daughters, women raped by men they trusted, young girls preyed on by those meant to protect them.
In my old boarding school, “Visiting Sundays” — when parents were supposed to visit their wards — were often hijacked by men pretending to be relatives just to see their under-18 “girlfriends.”
And when it all fell apart, the girls were blamed for “seducing” grown men.
This Isn’t About Shaming Ghana — It’s About Naming the Sickness
We cannot heal a culture that refuses to name its disease.
When people can go online and openly describe how they raped a drunk woman — and others sit there listening without challenging them — something has gone very, very wrong.
To every man who says he respects women:
Start by believing them.
Start by holding other men accountable.
Stop calling complicity culture.
When Accountability Looks Like Courage
When that man on TikTok kept blaming “spiritual attacks” for his victim’s distress, I requested to join the Live. I told him exactly what he’d done — rape.
I reminded him that in other countries, he would be in prison.
That’s when he would shock everyone further by admitting that he preferred being intimate with women when they were “tipsy.” But we all know the word he was searching for — drunk.
And his friend — the one who “promises” women to him, who pimps out his female staff to visitors — there’s a name for him too.
Trafficker.
Poverty is not an excuse to exploit women. It never was.
If You Need Support
If anything I’ve written here has affected you, please reach out to a sexual abuse helpline in your area.
If you don’t know where to turn, you can also reach out to me directly — and I will help you find the right resources and support.
To Every Survivor
It was not your fault.
You are not what was done to you.
I wish you love and healing — truly.
Let’s create the change we need by telling the truth and sharing our stories.
Koya Nkrumah 
This is so true about the Ghanaian society, we should all contribute to make men of such behaviour know it’s not right
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