The Dignity of Bitterness.

When audacity exposes the narratives we’ve learned to accept.

Sometimes, audacity is the slap in the face we need to realise that some of the narratives we have accepted as normal are deeply flawed.

A few years ago, an old schoolmate reached out to me online. I was surprised — we were never friends, and the only interaction I remember from childhood was him criticising me, at fifteen, for “lightening my skin.” I had been experimenting with makeup, wearing an older cousin’s foundation. She was lighter than me. At the time, I felt embarrassed and said nothing.

Over twenty years later, he resurfaced to remind me that I was “getting late” to walk down the aisle.

I calmly told him I wasn’t interested in marriage or starting a family at that stage of my life. That answer displeased him. He lectured me about refusing to “populate the earth,” as though my body and future were a public service.

When I finally told him to piss off, he reached for the familiar insult — “you’ll end up bitter”.

There it was. . .

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This reflection continues in my paid Substack — a quieter, more intentional space where I share longer essays, lived truths, and the conversations we don’t often have out loud.

I’ve chosen to place my deeper writing there so I can continue creating with honesty, care, and sustainability.

If this resonated and you’d like to continue reading, you’re very welcome to join me here:

[Read the full essay on Substack]

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Thank you for being here.

Change, through shared experiences.