Author: Koya Nkrumah
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You Are Not Late: Redefining Milestones on My Own Terms
By 28, I was “supposed” to be married with 2.5 children, a family home, a dog, and a fulfilling career. But those were never my dreams. I wasn’t the little girl planning a wedding in her head. My parents and guardians had their blueprint, and they repeated it so often that I stopped myself from…
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Why “I’m Okay” Was the Biggest Lie I Told Myself
I bet you’ve forgotten lockdown by now. For me, it’s a time I’ll never shake off. The first few months were brutal. No office. No routine. No distractions. Just me, my thoughts, and the uncomfortable truth that I couldn’t escape my own company. One afternoon, after a frustrating call with my father, I was ranting…
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From Ranting on Paper to Journaling With Purpose
Do you have a way to process your thoughts and feelings at the end of each day? I do! For years, journaling has been my outlet. My notebooks were full of rants, dreams, raw emotions, and half-finished thoughts. It was cathartic — but it often left me stuck. I could pour everything onto the page,…
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When Doing Everything Right Still Feels Wrong: Learning to Deal with Disappointment
Have you ever done everything “right” — updated your CV, reached out to people, sent countless emails — and still, nothing changed? How did that feel? This week, while scrolling through social media, I came across a video of a young man sharing his frustrations. He had done it all: rewritten his CV, contacted recruiters,…
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Finding Joy in the Middle of the Grind
Why do we act like happiness is something we have to earn? For years, I believed joy was something you celebrated after the work was done. I was wrong. Recently, I was telling a friend about all the things I had planned — the goals, the deadlines, the next big steps. She listened patiently as…
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When the Lens is Cracked, Even the Sun Looks Dangerous!
“When the lens is cracked, even the sun looks dangerous.” I said this to a friend earlier this week after she shared a frustrating experience with someone we both know. On the surface, this person’s reaction to a simple disagreement seemed extreme—but as we peeled back the layers, something became clear. I told my friend,…
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When Perfection Silences You: Choosing Progress Instead.
For too long, I let perfection silence me. Today, I choose progress. I choose to tell the stories that have lived inside me—raw, unfinished, and real. There Are Stories I’ve Never Told Not because I didn’t believe in them, but because I was waiting for them to be perfect. As a child, I was an…
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Coming Home to Yourself
It was a quiet Friday morning. The breeze softly moved the linen-and-cotton blend curtains—cream, taupe, and gold—at my bedroom window. Through the cracks, I watched the sunrise painting the sky in layers of orange and yellow. My Echo Dot played gentle rain sounds beside me as I read a romance novel I’d downloaded during a…
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Why We Sing ‘R-E-S-P-E-C-T’ But Rarely Give It
Aretha Franklin gave us one of the most iconic hits of all time. I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s had a solo concert moment or been on a dance floor shouting out, “R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me!” It brings up joyful memories for many of us—but lately, I’ve been thinking…
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Unmasking the Soft Feminine Era: Who Are We Really Performing For?
There’s a quiet movement happening among women. A shift in tone, in energy. We’re calling it the “soft feminine era”. It’s everywhere—on TikTok, in journal prompts, in the slow rebranding of self-care. It tells us to lean into ease, to receive rather than chase, to soften our edges, tap into our intuition, rest more, talk…
Koya Nkrumah 