Category: Coming Home to Yourself
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How to Clean Your Vulva — and Why You Were Taught to Fear It
You were taught your body was dirty and kept ready for a man. Here’s who taught you that, why it isn’t true, and how to reclaim it as your own.
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Why saying no feels unsafe when you’re the one everyone leans on.
“I would never have missed it for anything in the world!” To many reading the social media post that had this statement, it looked like a harmless message on the surface – but to me, it was a dismissal of something very serious that had happened to me. My crime? I had decided to not…
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When You React Bigger Than the Moment: Understanding Your Triggers
Ever had someone react to a situation in a way that made you pause and think “that was a bit much”? Or perhaps you reacted – in a way that made another person or even yourself wonder what your reaction was truly about? The raised voice, change in facial expressions and body posture – or…
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It Takes a Village — But Who Holds the Village Up?
“She has nobody” These were the words I heard from my brother when I had already said no to my sister. I changed my mind and plans to accommodate everyone again – because I love them. Became the babysitter again – the children love me and I do love them so much. So last week,…
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Am I Auditioning?
“How come I am the one everyone wants around but never enough to be chosen?” These were words from a creator on TikTok. And I felt them. I knew the feeling too well and this TikTok creator had put words to it perfectly – so much so that it stopped my mindless scrolling. I was…
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Is This It?
Burnout, identity, and the life I had learned to endure. The expectations that kept moving, the standards that never seemed satisfied — what really was the point? Was it worth losing myself? Did I want to continue living like this for the rest of my life? I did not like the answer, because who was…
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The Illusion of a Good Woman
“She is such a humble woman” – this was the comment I read under a video on TikTok and I could not scroll past it. There were many comments like this one on the post and most came from men – but this particular comment drew me in enough for me to stop and ask…
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I Felt Happy — And Could Not Say It Out Loud
I felt happy – and I could not say it out loud. Not even to myself. It was a slow Saturday morning – I had gotten out of bed, showered, done my skin care and had taken a moment to sit down and reflect. As I wrote down how I was feeling, I noticed the…
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There Is No Expiry Date on Grief.
When my mother died, I remember wanting to call her – to tell her that she had died. It was a weird feeling I could not describe. One that still brings tears to my eyes when I remember how I felt that day when I noticed I would never be able to call her again.…
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Who did I become to survive?
“You seem harsh lately – almost mean”. She paused and looked me in the eyes and continued “You used to save the little insects and was so nurturing towards everyone, especially animals – what happened?” I did not have an answer for my friend – I remembered what happened that day, how I had reacted…
Koya Nkrumah 